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Quotes Nueves Karl Brill [advice given to sixth-formers in a physics lesson] make sure you smear the
area with a good dollop of KYJelly [in a science lesson about vacuums] Can you breathe in a
vacuum? Hayley Larkin She doesnt remember most
of the night, im filling her in And just so as u no,
things like that r illegal in all 50 states! Courtesy of Hayley "Golden, Ripe, Boneless Bananas,
39 Cents A Pound." - Ad in the "Missoulian" by Orange
Street Food Farm "Sure there have been injuries and
deaths in boxing - but none of them serious." - Alan Minter, Boxer In Kentucky, by law, every
person has to take at least one bath a year. |
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I've always ordered beverages one
simple way: "A Coke, please." Lately, though, this hasn't seemed to
work. Waitresses now often respond, "I'm sorry, we don't have Coke. We
have Pepsi, Diet Pepsi, Dr. Pepper, Mr. Pibb." Tired of listening to the long list of
soft drinks, I thought I'd make life easier. So one day I simply asked the
snack bar clerk at a movie theater for a "dark, carbonated
beverage." The young man behind the
counter chuckled and asked, "Sir, would you like a cylindrical plastic
sucking device with that?" |
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"I think that the film Clueless
was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think
lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness." - Alicia Silverstone,
Actress Amy Wittingham I’d dog it for a quid! I’ve gotta take my
trousers down cuz I’m going to piss Tom Henderson I’m organised… I know
where everything is, just it’s in a pile Tom Henderson vs. his mate Sam Sam: " theres loads of girls on my
course........it'd be good if i was straight" Tom:
".....Erm.....Straight?...." *Sam looks sheepish* Sam: "i mean
single.....singles, i meant to say single!" Tom’s acquaintance Paul Paul drops his fork “could my life get
any worse?!” Paul slips on ice “argh!!............that
was a genuine noise” Sees someone or something
who isn’t himself: ”you're not paul!” Simon Heisterkamp talking about squares All the corners are far
too pointy Mathmatiquotement: Bertrand Russell “Thus mathematics may be defined as the subject
in which we never know what we are talking about, nor whether what we are
saying is true” Find out more about maths. Big Brother
masterquotage: Michelle pleads “No, no, don’t have a naked hot
tub. If they have a naked hot tub,
they’ll be naked together in the hot tub.” Emma tells Big Brother
that she couldn’t have predicted the answer
– “I would never have guessed that in a million dollars” End of School quotes: Stuart Jones - "I got
confused by what week it was" Ms Carré - "No, Andy,
you’re not supposed to be writing boobless on your calculator" Mr Brill asks “what
happened in 1918?” Duff replies dryly "a
whole 365 days of pure fun" Mathsquote of 2004: Greg Roddick - "The answer
is nine-tooths". What Greg meant was the fraction 9/2, and
it wasn’t even the right answer. Masterquote of May: Evel Knievel - "If I'd have been killed, I'd
be dead"
Sharnbrook’s tallest man: Luke ‘Everest’
Barnett
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